The Amazing Placebentinol: Miracle Drug

Introducing Placebentinol the wunderdrug. A cure for all with almost no side effects.

The Amazing Placebentinol: Miracle Drug

Are you suffering from any of the following symptoms:

  • Bloated
  • Constipated
  • Nauseated
  • Depressed
  • Muscle soreness
  • Joint soreness
  • Sore throat
  • Sore feet
  • Sore weird spot kind of between your ribs but also not
  • Fatness
  • Skinniness
  • Happiness
  • Angriness
  • Hunger
  • Hanger

If so, then Minimally Useful Pharmaceuticals latest creation Placebentinol may be for you. It has been known to cure all the above ailments and more after just the first dose.

Is Placebentinol right for you?

Placebentinol is not for everyone. To find out if Placebentinol is right for you, just ask yourself, do you think it will work for you? If so, then it is right for you. If not, you should just stop reading now and know that nobody likes you.

It may even remove your odd smile lines and make it so you can finally grow facial hair!

How it works

Placebentinol works by taking advantage of your brain's ability to believe anything we tell you while we're wearing a lab coat like Dr. Ecstasia above. It has a 100% success rate and has never caused a fatality**.

Side Effects

Like all medications, talk to your local drug dealer before starting Placebentinol to see if it's right for you as there may be some side effects. Possible side effects include:

  • Supreme awesomeness
  • A weird feeling of hope while still living on this planet
  • Hangriness
  • Finally being cool
  • Extra attention from women
  • Extra attention from men
  • Extra attention from dogs
  • Ability to talk to cats

Get Placebentinol

To try Placebentinol today, go down to your local corner, start screaming "Placebentinol" as loud as you can and a Placebentinol rep will be with you shortly. Be prepared to spend a variable amount of money based on local markets. It is best to come prepared with at least $2,000 in unmarked bills.

Just look how happy those elbows or weird potato people are

Try Placebentinol today!

*Placebentinol is an unregistered trademark of the fictional company Minimally Useful Pharmaceuticals. These statements have not been evaluated by the FDA no matter how awesome this drug sounds. Placebentinol may or may not be a sugar pill taking advantage of you being a sucker and the placebo effect. If you or someone you love would like to help us peddle Placebentinol on TikTok, please contact us on our beeper. If you are upset because you took Placebentinol and do not feel that it worked, take more and really believe in it's healing powers.
**Minimally Useful Pharmaceuticals was found not guilty on all counts in the case of Hamburglar vs Minimally Useful Pharmaceuticals. Medicine can not be deemed the cause of death when some punk bitch tries to rob you of your lunch while you're at the shooting range. RIP.